Urine test

[tonyp]

My urologist’s office called the other day and explained that my scheduled appointment would now be done over the phone due to the coronavirus.

One hour before the scheduled teleconference, I was instructed (via email) to administer my own urine test.

This was to avoid those lab tests and costly co-pays that your doctors tell you to get at Quest Diagnostics, and because they're shutdown too.

Simply go outside and pee in the front yard.
If ants gather: DIABETES.
If you pee on your feet: PROSTATE
If it smells like a barbecue: CHOLESTEROL
If your wrist hurts when you shake it: OSTEOARTHRITIS
If you return to your house with your penis outside your pants: ALZHEIMER'S

[bristleposh]

I think I might have all of it